Lesson 15 - USE HUMOR

"Did you wake up grumpy today?" "No, I let him sleep."

"Every survival kit should include a sense of humor"

 

Humor is good medicine. The healing power of humor is documented in both the scientific and popular press. The role of laughter aids both physical and mental ills. We all can attest to the fact that laughter makes us feel better. "A sense of humor helps accept the unattractive, endure the unpleasant, deal with the unexpected, and smile through the unbearable."

A sense of humor reduces people and problems to their proper proportions. It can help relieve tension and possible conflict. It can get a message heard and even blunt negative comments or criticism. It can help you manage a difficult situation. It is also a way of bringing a problem or issue out into the open to be accepted or dealt with more easily. It may be used to see a situation in a new perspective.

Some examples
1. To blunt negative aspects of your directions or requests:
An assistant principal in a Palo Alto high school has an effective way of informing over-romantic students about the campus rules against lingering kisses. One of her statements which she says usually works is, "If you can't wait till you're married, could you wait till after school."

2. To be more tactful in making your point:
A politician who was misquoted by the press wants to set the record straight. At the next press conference he says, "I hate to be misquoted because I can't stand to have other people's feet in my mouth. I have my own foot in my mouth quite often enough. There is one thing, however, I would like to clear up."

3. To get your message heard:
A dentist sent out this letter to a client who had not paid his outstanding bill for dental services rendered over a year ago."Dear Mr. Jones, After checking our records, we note that we have done more for you than your own mother did. We have carried you for 14 months. Please remit the $75.00 you owe. We won't charge you anything for the past 14 months.

4. To show an openness and understanding of a problem:
A business manager meets with two employees to inform them that they have to make arrangements to pay back an overpayment of $100 in their last month's checks. He mentions that they owe the money back and admits that last month's accounting department procedures were 100 percent correct only part of the time.

5. To put a situation in a new perspective:
Everybody loved Stacy. She had been going with this nice man for two years now. "They seemed to be meant for each other. Such a wonderful couple." -- all their friends commented. "She is so patient and considerate of his problem. He has a wooden leg, you know." -- they observed. When Stacy's romance abruptly ended, all her friends came running to find out about what had ended the relationship with the man with the wooden leg. "We had a fight and I broke it off," she explained.

6. To defuse a complaint:
The toll fee at the Golden Gate Bridge increased from $1.00 to $2.00 on weekends. One person refused to pay and complained for three minutes. The toll taker listened attentively and then said, "Does this mean you're not going to buy a ticket to the toll takers ball?"

7. To handle an embarrassing situation:
You are meeting your fiancee's parents for the first time. As you step forward to meet them, you trip on the carpet and almost fall down on the floor. Recovering your balance and your composure you say, "I can also do card tricks."

8. To be facetious:
Well, Joe, how is your marriage?"
"I would say my marriage was happy. It's just living together afterward that has had it's problems." When President Truman was asked how many people work in the State Department, he replied, "About half of them."

Cultivating A Sense of Humor Have you ever been in a situation which was not funny at all when it happened but later on when you started thinking about it you almost died laughing?

A few years ago I loaned my daughter $100 which she was to pay back after her summer job. Summer ended and she had not paid the money back. I reminded her about her obligation and she said she would give it to me tomorrow. Tomorrow came and I was sitting in my office talking to a student who was in one of my speech classes. My daughter walked into my office and handed me a wad of money. (It turned out to be 100 $1 bills.) Turning quickly toward the door she winked and said, "Thanks for the "A". Sitting there dumbfounded I said to the student, "Oh! That was my daughter. I loaned her some money and she's paying it back." "Sure," he replied. Later on when I got over considering that my reputation was now ruined, my daughter and I laughed ourselves silly over what she had done.

If laughter is so great why can't we come up with a humorous reply or response when we find ourselves enmeshed in the difficult situation? If you are one of the persons who can come up with a humorous response in a pressured situation, congratulate yourself. If you are one who can't, check the list of whys below.
1) Nothing funny ever happens to me.
2) My responses are sarcastic not humorous.
3) I can't think of anything to say, let alone something funny.
4) Only wimps use humor.
5) Someone else in my family got all the humor genes.
6) I don't think funny.
7) I take everything very seriously.

Funny people were not born that way, they learned it. Not everyone needs to be funny, humor is not the most appropriate response in every situation. Humor, however, is an effective way to deal with many difficult situations.

Look for comedy in life If you want to be more able to add humor to life's events you can start by looking for the comedy in what happens to you and those around you. Adopt an attitude of looking for humor in everyday things. Did I ever tell you about the time my five year-old son urinated on the television set? It could have been a very shocking experience. My family and I were all seated in the family room engrossed in "Lassie the Wonderdog" or some such dog movie. My five year-old had an over filled bladder which he apparently had not paid attention to for quite a while. The TV was sitting next to the bathroom door. Feeling an undeniable urge, he jumped up, raced to the bathroom and unzipping his pants on the run he somehow managed to place a stream right into the side of the television set. A small explosion occurred, the TV went black, and white smoke oozed out of its louvered vents. Needless to say the other family members were very upset that they could no longer watch their program and the TV was destroyed. You should hear the story about taking it in to try to get it fixed!

"It's bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips." --Fred Allen

"He who laughs, lasts." Robert Fulgrum

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